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The Airport

Arriving at the airport is always the easiest part: Quick drop off, little to no people interaction. It usually goes very very awry just after that.

Check In

Check ins keep getting easier and easier, thanks to technology. The Electronic ticket machine is my best friend, most machines are actually, so much easier to deal with than people. If you have no bags to check, you have it made: no human interaction. Of course, things can still go downhill.

Waiting in line to use the E-Ticket machine are a handful of characters common to every airport: the Old Lady who has no clue about computers and the Anxious Couple who arrive at the airport a scant 30 minutes before their flight.

This trip the clueless lady was particularly old and particularly good at playing her part. Cutting in line, without any regard for the rest of us, she goes to an E-Ticket machine that is opening up. I thought anxious husband was going to burst a blood vessel, this could get interesting. Cell phone in hand some one on the other end proceeds to walk her through the check in process. The irony of this whole scene seemed to be lost on all but myself; not only was she not utilizing the machine to move through the check in process faster, she could have went to the line with a check in girl and been assisted, instead she was yammering on the phone, tying up the already limited number of machines, and generally messing up the whole process.

She hunches down to the screen. “It says ‘Click here to start’.” Pushing the touch screen, she moves from screen to screen with agonizing slowness. With every touch comes more questions, from both the screen and the woman. “Now which one do I push again? The yes one? No, well too late. Can I go backwards on this thing?” All the while Anxious husband is muttering and cursing about how unbelievable this whole thing is.

“Why do they have so few machines? Why is everyone taking so long? This is bullshit!”

Another machine opens and the guy in front of me moves to take it. I’m next.

“Did anyone give me a knife or a gun? Are they serious? Oh my” Old Lady isn’t fairing very well. “I don’t have any bags to check, so what do I do?”

Anxious wife is trying to sooth her deteriorating better half. How people after 9/11 can arrive at airports with less than an hour before their flight leaves is beyond me. Yet here they are.

“Jesus! We’re going to miss our damn flight! This is ridiculous!”

“Honey. It’s ok. We’ll make it.”

”No we won’t! We’ve only got 20 minutes before the flight leaves! Oh man it’s gonna cost us a fortune to get the tickets changed.

My turn. Being somewhat of an old pro at this whole E-Ticket thing (It’s been a good 4 years since I held a paper ticket) I calmly enter my confirmation code, committed to memory for convenience. A few screens later I’m confirming my seating assignment, then assuring the computer that I am in fact not carrying any weapons, that my bags have been under my watchful eye the entire time and that I have not accepted any packages strange or otherwise from people I do not know. I’m done and waiting for the ticket agent to call my name to take my luggage. She does and I’m moving on, past Anxious couple and their machine.

“You have the confirmation code?

“Hon, I thought you had it?”

“No, I don’t. You made the reservation!”

“Here it is, it was in your carry on.”

“How the hell did it get in there? You must’ve put it in there.”

Anxious Wife smiles knowingly. Anxious Husband gets the luggage ready while his wife handles the “damn” computer.

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Tags: Writing

826

I heard about the 826 project from David Sedaris, at a reading he did in Orange County a few months back. Now there are 826 projects in numerous cities, includeing seattle, and LA and others. It started in New York as I understand it. It sounds like a really great idea. I there was a location closer to me, i’d like to be involved. Seeing as how I am moving to Colorado, and 826Denver would be needed. One can hope, it really is a great cause.

Tags: David Sedaris

The Commercial Space

Jake had never been to space. That in and of itself wasn’t really all that weird, given that commercial space flight had only really taken off in the last ten years. Still largely the domain of the rich or the sweepstakes winner. In fact this trip wouldn’t have been possible if not for Gram’s untimely passing. Having married successfully several times she had a sizable estate. She had been planning a trip to the station for months, it was the latest of her routine trips to the far corners of the globe, this time the corner was going to be a little bit farther. The Lawsuit had added extra padding to Jakes inheritance. Hard to believe companies couldn’t keep the proximity sensors maintained on their delivery trucks even in this day and age.

So here sits Jake, waiting in the recently completed Space Launch Annex of Los Angeles International Airport off the coast of Southern CA. The LAX Space Launch was a pretty nice place, it should be it was only a year old. Having never been in the other space launch annexes Jake had no frame of reference for it’s amenities but he assumed it was right up there with the best of them.

The Space Launch Annex is essentially a floating city. About 5 miles in diameter, complete with its own services; police, trash, even a mayor, or rather an administrator. A space launch annex is really a pretty neat place, even if you aren’t going to be on the space plane actually going to space. Technologically speaking they’re the most advanced locations on Earth. Which makes sense since they send and receive space planes 24 hours a day. LAX is the third to be completed, the Sydney Australia project just broke ground.

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Tags: Writing

Wrting samples coming soon

I’m hoping this weekend I’ll be able to put up some of the stories I’ve been working on. Hoping. I’ll also be talking about my new lawn mower

Tags: Writing